Tom Green - Don't Mess With A Man (After He Takes A Big Poo Poo) lyrics

[singing with beat] Check it out, yeah Don't mess with a man, right after he takes a big poo-poo It's not the time to be dramatic, right after he takes a big poo-poo You gotta watch what you say; right after a man takes a poo-poo Because his liable to freak out, right after he dumps his doo-doo I knew a guy named Jamal, addicted to prank phone calls He called the bowling alley to talk about his balls And then he hung up and hid in the bathroom stall, and took a big poo-poo It stunk so bad he didn't know what to do-do, the wallpaper started peeling So he wiped his bu*t and started dancing on the ceiling, just like Lionel Ritchie The only difference, he just taken a crap and his bu*t was itchy Then he went and caught a movie, and he ate some popcorn, started slurping on a spoon The chick in front of him said 'be quiet' So he slapped the f**ing fat b**h and told her to go on a diet See, her boyfriend started a riot, so he pulled out his Glock and said 'don't even try it' Don't mess with a man, right after he takes a big poo-poo It's not the time to be dramatic, right after he takes a big poo-poo You gotta watch what you say; right after a man takes a poo-poo Because his liable to freak out, right after he dumps his doo-doo One day I was sitting on the toilet, reading a magazine and trying to enjoy it I think it was an article in Popular Mechanics, bout how to use Mechano to make a praying mantis I got bored so I got off the crapper, washed my hands and turned the light off with a clapper See, I didn't want to hit the light switch, see, people with poo on their hands probably had touched it So then I went and bought some gum, and then I walked around the shopping mall acting like a dum-dum Shoplifting some jeans at Old Navy, put them on my head and acting all crazy I said 'look at me, everybody, I'm a man with jeans on my head and if you don't like it then you got no cred' I flipped them all the bird and this is what I said, this is what I said! Don't mess with a man, right after he takes a big poo-poo It's not the time to be dramatic, right after he takes a big poo-poo You gotta watch what you say; right after a man takes a poo-poo Because his liable to freak out, right after he dumps his doo-doo I heard about a guy named Ricky, he took a poo in a paper bag, it was sticky He went to detention, lit the bag on fire, now this is the type of story that I admire See the teacher stomped out the fire with his foot, and Ricky said 'b**h, you got my sh** on your foot, ha, b**h, you got my sh** on your foot, yeah!' Ricky said 'b**h, you got my sh** on your foot, ha!' Don't mess with a man, right after he takes a big poo-poo It's not the time to be dramatic, right after he takes a big poo-poo You gotta watch what you say; right after a man takes a poo-poo Because his liable to freak out, right after he dumps his doo-doo