The Rugburns - I Want To Learn About Love lyrics

My mouth was just as dry as the tampon dispenser In the women's bathroom at the Oceanside bus station A constipated woman barged in on me and said "Eeek! A boy! Get out before I call Queer Nation!" But the police did arrive And they said, "What's with this guy? He's been watching these women pee Doin' a study like he's doctor Leakey Just to learn about love" But I want to learn about love Yeah I want to learn about love Yeah I want to learn about love Can you show me today? Well I walked into the adult bookstore And my heart was beating louder than the drums at the tip of Zimbabwe They never taught me nothin' 'bout this in Catholic School They only said if I was bad, I would incur the wrath of Mr. Yahweh But the bodies were uncurled And they screamed and moaned and hurled And the boys was dressed as girls And the women got splashed with pearls And they said it was love But I want to learn about love Yeah I want to learn about love Yeah I want to learn about love Can you show me today? Well I cruised the red light zone But I still felt all alone And I turned a nasty trick And I drank till I got sick I'm sick, I'm so sick, I'm so sick Well I watched Oprah the other day There were some mothers on the show that decided to screw their daughters' boyfriends The daughters were mad, and the boyfriends were glad Because they got an education by burnin' the candle at both ends Oprah's dress was canary yellow And I think that she fancied that fellow And the crotch in his corduroys bulged And the truth it was soon divulged When they taught us 'bout love But I want to learn about love