The Merry Wives Of Windsor - Letters From Sea lyrics

My husband went to sea, Six long months ago, His fortune for to find And I long to see him so. And one fine day I met A sailor out on leave. He'd met my husband dear And this letter he received. My dearest wife, (my dear) I think that we Have been at sea For a bit too long, my dear. I now feel wary As the crew calls me Mary And I sleep each night in fear. Yesterday I caught 'em Staring at my bottom. I'll come back when I can. I love to fornicate For s** is great, But not with another man. Several weeks had pa**ed. I could not remain merry Because I lived in fear, For my husband's cherry, And to my great relief, Good tidings bore this day. I met another sailor And a second letter gay. My dearest wife, (my dear) I know that we Have been at sea For far too long I dread, For the pious pastor And the fat quartermaster, Sleep in the same bunk bed Oh, redhead Roy, The cabin boy, Locked himself below, I'll leave when I can When we next find land, And I'll find my way back home. Several months had pa**ed. My impa**ioned heart did burn To see my husband dear, Awaiting his return. And much to my surprise, There came another boat And another sailor - Yoohoo! - Bearing another note. My dearest wife, (my dear) I think that we Will remain at sea For a few months truth to tell For the second mate Thinks I'm great And we hit it off quite well. In a drunken mist I couldn't resist. When the rum pa**ed round, I went. But s** is rife In a sailor's life If your indiscriminate. My husband dear, I think that ye Should stay at sea, For the soothest truth I tell, For on your return, Your house I'll burn And I'll send you straight to hell. So all young wives, If you be wise, Do heed this sorry song For you can't compete With the men of the fleet When your husband's away too long.