The Former Fat Boys - Jaego - The Second Cumming of Mettis (SomethingAwful Rap Battle) lyrics

Probably hopes I lose so I can give Lowtax ten bucks Okay Never done this before So I'm supposed to make fun of this kid with three posts on the Internet? Not really much information Alright, so, better get my dick out and start waving it around, I guess Dear me, here we go I was sitting in my room building with my space Legos Flying spaceships around writing this is about Jaego's Don't know much about this emcee from Encino If I can win spelling bees by spelling "archipelago" Then I think I can beat up some f*g who can't even slay through Can picture him chilling with ICP sipping Faygo Now I hate saying he's lame, yo, I'm hidden I ain't battle much yet but I can hope for a better beginning A little challenge to balance my overabundance of talents People loving my sh** trading it like electrons on valance I'm the new oid emcee with nada to lose Looking up to taking down Senor Ja Rule too Five years in the game, is the claim I ain't heard his name But he's playing with fire--me--so he's going to get enflamed So watch the smoke clear He versus fate, DMX I'm $ucks**, baby, and he's just like all the rest Another dude in line like a million long from the streets So wanna-be Jay Z banging beats Like every two weeks Rocking high school you pipsqueek You lied to me saying rap full-time, yo, that's weak So desparate for attention rhyming to me over AIM And every track you got slaughtered with you yelling your own name Yo Jaego go home pack your bags cause your sh** won't flow Yo and that sound click about k**ing yourself? Hope it wasn't a joke And I suppose you might comment That my style's a bit soft I got girls to f** you got little boys s**ing you off Ain't seen your pic to be sure If you black or you're white I heard rapping motherf**er and it ain't all that tight Oh and speaking of AIM And speaking of asking for pics Can't believe you requested mine Starting to doubt you like chicks See this is a diss, this is how it's done Flow like harpoon, repeat step one I've been waiting in the winds It's time to let this rookie teach I'm f**ing Save by the Bell And you're only California Dreams And my voice is kind of high-pitch I've made peace with that though Then there's you making your's all artificially low You a man you ain't got nothing to worry about Unless you scared the whole world is going to find out That your voice ain't so deep and you're really just a kid And you really just fronting because lord made you a chick Whatever it is No there's no shame in getting beat At least that's what I heard because I never tasted defeat Face it, f**er While you're trying to bore us You're just a puny little human, I'm a dinosaurus And you may hang out at home I think you might become a star It ain't hard to hang out there if you got your mommy's credit card So tell me f**er how am I doing so far? You like [?] [?spanish] See I can knock you out in mas que en langa My talent is grinding while yours is pequanå I guess that's it I think I'm done had my fun and I'm done Nobody to tally the votes I know the results: I won This is what it's down to When it's all said and done This sh** was over motherf**er before it begun I'm the one the only some done chose me to leave On your mark, get set, ready Jaego Seriously, please