The Arrogant Worms - Christmas Turkey Blues lyrics

Hey kid, why the long face Is it cuz Santa Clause is flying right over your place You've been a bad kid all year So quit you snivellin' s**er now and mop up them tears You don't deserve a damn thing You're not even cute and your attitude stinks It must s** to be you Nobody likes you so what can you do You think you got problems kid, you think you got strife But come each December do you fear for your life Oh well, I'm your turkey, baby, so your troubles are small Now I'm stuffed on your table, I'm a tasty bu*terball Cuz I've got the Christmas turkey blues If you got your necked ripped out then you'd have them too Cuz I've got the Christmas turkey blues You chase me and waste and baste me and taste me and drown me in gravy too Let's take a walk! Gobble, gobble baby! You sir, you look like heck Didn't you get your Christmas bonus cheque Or maybe your woman left you Ripped your heart right out of your chest and spat on it too Is that why you're reeking of gin You look disheveled and there's drool on your chin You thought that this love would last But she said, "Merry Christmas, baby" and she booted your a** Well that's tough for you mister, too bad about your ordeal How about getting stuffed in the wintertime, see how you feel I don't get to yank no bones or make me a wish It won't be long 'til I'm just some scraps on your dish Cuz I've got the Christmas turkey blues If your bu*t was stuffed and roasted then you'd have then too I've got the Christmas turkey blues You chase me and waste and baste me and taste me and drown me in gravy too Cuz I've got the Christmas turkey blues Oh, you know what it's like having the Christmas Turkey blues, baby? I tell you -- hey, what are you doing with that axe? Oh no, oh no, oh no, baby, NO! Well, now that I'm here on your plate, what do you want? You want some white meat or some dark meat, leg, breast, or thigh? Hey, you ought to see my giblet you know Oh, oh, OH! Cuz I've got the Christmas turkey blues Wouldn't you just rather have some ham, or how about some chicken...