The ACTUAL God - What's Your Ideal Day? lyrics

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The ACTUAL God - What's Your Ideal Day? lyrics

I went to a Shakespeare lecture with the Actual Liz today instead of going to my Actual cla**. Moqtada al lecture, an acquaintance asked, "Are you in this cla**?" I replied, "Yea, I just don't come to lecture much. The professor's good though." Silence. "Really excellent, an excellent lecturer, really." Silence. "He's really good." Silence. "Quite good?" Nothing. I broke into a giggle and blurted, "I'm just kidding I'm not in this cla** I just came with Liz, hahaha." He was pissed that I confused him. f**er. It's people like you who bring out the monster in me. Said monster was wreaking havoc last night during my interview for Skull and Bones. I couldn't get down with them, because they only speak in superlatives. I don't have a best or favorite or most anything. This really happened: Girl interviewer: What would be your ideal day? Me: My ideal day, uhh? Girl: Yea, like just give us the rundown, morning to night. You know, what's your ideal day? Me: My ideal day, alright...let me think, umm. Huh, ideal day, alright... Girl: You don't have to answer. Me: No it's not like that. Girl: - (you are pathetic) Me: Alright, my ideal day...I wake up, real fresh (this is going fine, just keep going). Uh, get out of bed, all fresh, good sleep cycles. Wait, is this my ideal day at Y**e or anywhere? Girl: Anywhere. Me: Ohhhhh, OK. Ummmm....I don't know. So I'm up then, feeling fresh--I guess I win the lottery? I don't really think about this type of thing. Uhhh, I don't know, it would be pretty fun?... Girl: Alright, we can move on. Ok, who do you most admire in the entire world? Me: Hmm, who do I most admire? Uhh.. etc. For ideal day I should have said: Wake up, smoke weed, f**, smoke weed, eat 'ritos, f**, reverse slam dunk, destroy the enemy, coconut milk, Rainbow Brite, Randy Savage, praise the Lord, slip and slide, chip's ahoy, mother's womb, gunshot, eternal slumber. Oh well.