Stephen Lynch - D&D lyrics

Harmonica More harmonica [Verse 1] I got my 12-sided die and I'm ready to roll with a wizard and my goblin crew My friends are coming over to my mom's basement bringing Funyuns and the Mountain Dew I got a big broadsword made outta cardboard, and that stereo's a-pumping Zeppelin Dazed and Confused It's that time of the night we turn on the black light Let the Dungeons and the Dragons begin It's D&D Fighting' with the legends of yore It's D&D Never kissed a lady before Nope, I said it Whoo! [Skit 1] C'mon You gonna bring the thunder Bring the f**ing thunder C'mon bring the thunder c'mon lets go *guitar pluck* Oh that's nice Why don't you bring some thunder mother f**er I'll bring some thunder alright *rattle* [Verse 2] Now the Lord of the Rings, the Dark Crystal and things, we use these as a reference tool And when we put on our cloaks and tell warlock jokes, we're the coolest kids in the school No we're not I know Now Teich's a real ba*tard, but a fair dungeon master, he's got hit points and charisma to land And I rehearse in my room, or what I call the dragon's tomb, when I'm not out with my girl friend It's D&D [Skit 2] Wait wait wait wait wait Teich, hold on, I'm sorry, hold on, I'm sorry, gimme one second Dude, come on What Seriously What You got a f**ing girlfriend "Dungeon Master" Uhh… That's kind of a dick thing to say [Chorus] It's D&D Summoning the demons of hell It's D&D When our shift ends at the Taco Bell Gordita, Chalupa [Verse 3] Well my medieval brother, there's room here for another Would you care to take a roll of the die You guys make me weep you think that you could keep up with a warrior as mighty as I See you're in mortal danger I'm a first cla** ranger whose half gargoyle and half elf And if that doesn't scare you maybe I should be ware you of what lurks within my gaming shelf Next to my junior high annual lies my monster manual and my customized dungeon masters screen I've got treasures and traps on my graph paper maps next to my three inch solid pewter figurines So if you think you've got the balls bring on your dungeon master calls I'll be protected by my robe of destruction I will leave you both in tears because I'm the dungeon master here and you two are in need of some instruction [Outro] Virgins till the day weeeeeeeee… Oh, oh, oh, oh No, No, No, No, No 1, 2, f** You Dieeeee