Sorority Noise - Disappeared lyrics

I took some time to myself To sort out all the things That make me feel the way that I feel Just this year I lost a basketball team to heaven And I'm sure they're shooting jumpers With Jesus, Mary and Joseph And they said "they wouldn't notice it" If they had disappeared But I swore I got a phone call So that seemed pretty weird So caught up in my own head I took a walk down my street Thought I'd find something to eat But I headed back immediately 'Cause I'm pretty scared of guns So go out and have fun, let loose And I'll daydream of the noose that took my friend Sean's life And he thought we wouldn't notice it If he had disappeared But I swore I got a phone call So that seemed f**ing weird So caught up in my own head I took my hair down today And I took a shower for the first time in what felt like weeks I found myself falling down And I felt myself falling up [?] That can't seem to be the reason I can't sleep when I'm alone It's getting better [?] It's hard to think about you And at your funeral You swore that you would love me And I swore I'd love you too And you'll barely even notice it when I disappear