Phil Harris - The Darktown Poker Club lyrics

Bill Jackson was a poor old dub Who joined the Darktown Poker Club But cursed the day he told them he would join His money used to go like it had wings If he yelled queens, someone had kings And each night he would contribute all his coin Then he said Im gonna play em tight tonight He said therell be no bobtail flushes make me bite Cause when I gets in them my hands will be a peach And he played them tight but lost his pile And Bill got peevish after a while So he rose, looked all around, and made this speech He said you all see this brand new razor I had it sharpened just today Now Im coming in there with my rules That you must follow when you play Now keep your big bony hands on the table While you dealing, please And dont be slippin them aces down there Er, in between your knees And dont be makin all them funny signs Like you tryin to tip off your hand Just talk in American, boy, American Sos I can understand And dont be dealin off the bottom Because ooh thats rough Take five, five, then stop, thats enough Now when you bet put up the chips Because I dont like it when you shy Then if you get busted go on out and get some Im gonna be here by and by Pa** them cards for me to shuffle Everytime before you deals Then if anythings wrong, I must see Cause I mean, you always aint no, er Keep playin that game according to Mr. Hoyle You all play this game accordin to me Now sittin right there in that there clan There chance to be a one-eyed man And Bill kept watchin him out the corner of his eye When ole one-eye would deal and then Would cost that Bill another five or ten Bill got up again, looked all around him with a sigh He said, Lord, t