Paul Heaton & Jacqui Abbott - The Fat Man lyrics

The train’s running late, but the bills are on time Greggs and Social, there’s a permanent line Y’all blaming the fat man, you all think that it’s him Rather go McDonald’s or Burger King than go to the gym Every toffee wrapper that’s dropped in the street Seems to gravitate to the soles of your feet Every time you return from your Saturday shop Your neighbour’s eyes burn through the bags that you’ve got Rich in Armani, poor in velour Every takeaway’s a wide-open door Nicotine chewing gum, e-cigarettes The harder you try, the fatter you get The betting shop’s open, the grocery’s shut Every time you eat, there’s an almighty tut Y’all think it’s the fat man, you all think that it’s he You all think he carries a loyalty card for KFC Whenever they show the obese on the 6 o’ clock news They only ever show the waistline down to the shoes No face on the fat man, just a wobbling ma** Dead man walking all the way from the brain to the a** Rich in Armani, poor in velour Every takeaway’s a wide-open door Nicotine chewing gum, e-cigarettes The harder you try, the fatter you get So as the fat man, he sits, staring into thin air He’d choose the noose, but he’s broken the chair He’d take a cruise, throw himself off the boat He can’t swim, but he’d probably float Rich in Armani, poor in velour Every takeaway’s a wide-open door Nicotine chewing gum, e-cigarettes The harder you try, the fatter you get Rich in Armani, poor in velour Every takeaway’s a wide-open door Nicotine chewing gum, e-cigarettes The harder you try, the fatter you get