Jonny Dawson - My Life Is lyrics

Hi! My name is My name is Hi! My name is My name is Ahem Can I have the attention of the cla** for one second? Hi kids! Do you like violence? (Yeah, yeah, yeah!) Wanna see me put Nine Inch knifes through each one of the queens eyelids? (Uh-huh!) Wanna copy me and do exactly like I did? (Yeah, yeah!) Marry an old hag, and f** her up more than my life is? (Huh?) My trains f**ing late, I'm trying to get my head straight but I can't figure out which one of you I want to impregnate (Ummmm...) And Dr. Drake said, Uh-uhhh! 'So where Well since age twelve, I've felt like Pissing people off Cause I hung my brothers pants from the top window with a belt Got pissed off and ripped Katie Price And kicked her so hard I knocked her clothes backwards like Kris Kross I smoke a fat pound of cheese and fall on my a** faster than you, you b**h when you sit down too fast C'mere b**h! (Jonny, wait a minute, that's a girl dog!) I don't give a f**, God sent me to piss the world off! Hi! My name is My name is Hi! My name is My name is My English teacher wanted to flunk me last week Thanks a lot, next year I'll be one and a five I poked her in the face with a pencil, chased her with the table and stapled some nuts to one of her fingers (Owwwwwwww!) Walked into a strip-club, I was under age duh Flashed the bartender, then put the camera in the tip cup Stupid transs**uals, thinking they in a gay bar screaming at me: About ninety percent of my life I was lied to I I told her I would find a fudge packer Make a piss take of a record by one of those stupid blonde rappers (Oh f** you) You know pigeons blow up when you give them rice from your hands And all the girls scream like they So I decided to ask a random guy for an autograph (Dude, can I have your autograph?) So he signed it: Stop the tape! Michael wants a kid to play (Get him!) Dr. Drake, don I I (Huh yup!) Am I coming or going, look another fly I don All my life I I ain I go through more clothes than the incredible hulk I trip when I walk, I When I was little I would get so big I would grow tits HE I lay awake and hit myself in the head I get some leather straps and tie teddies to my bed (Zzzzzip) I Oh, and by the way when you see my dad? (Yeah Tell him I Hi! My name is My name is Hi! My name is My name is