Dodger - Guild Ho! lyrics

I saw a lovely darkened elf With hair as sleek as ebony Her armor seemed to betray The forces of our gravity I told her that I'd like to mount But mounting me would be a treat I stamped and swore The sword she wore Was not intended for deceit Guild Ho! Guild Ho! Horde ho to victory! No sum of gold could buy a better life All else is misery! Guild Ho! Guild Ho! Horde ho to victory! So grab a beer And flex your pecs It's time for us to march! I tripped upon a curvy gnome Whose cheek was all be-speckly Knee-high to me I could forsee A problem all quite vividly She stood in shock as I explained Positions that would work for us She roared and railed Cut off my tail And left my bod in maimedness Guild Ho! Guild Ho! Horde ho to victory! No sum of gold could buy a better life All else is misery Guild Ho! Guild Ho! Horde ho to victory! So flex your pecs And brush your tusks It's time for us to march! I nearly k**ed a human la** Of whom I found most dull and bore Her hair and nails did quite entail The life of a barstander's who*e I cast her off and rolled my eyes It's hardly worth an easy k** It wasn't less than seconds left Before I took myself a spill Dear listener, it's good to know Don't judge the cover of a book My heart was won for her that day After the beating that I took! Guild Ho! Guild Ho! Horde ho to victory! No sum of gold could buy a better life All else is misery Guild Ho! Guild Ho! Horde ho to victory! So brush your tusks And grab a beer It's time for us to march! So brush your tusks And grab a beer It's time for us to march! So flex your pecs And brush your tusks It's time for us to march, march, march, march (March, march, march)