DJ Jon - I'm Awesome (Remix) lyrics

[Intro: Spose] Whoops, I just made another Walmart anthem Still the opposite of tall, dark, handsome I got junk like a thumbtack, abs like a one pack Couldn't run one lap, hoes My hobbies include knitting Mittens, but that's only when I'm not snitching These other MCs feel bad ‘Cause I just discovered that my brother is my real dad The zaniest freak who rocks rhymes ‘Cause I simultaneously sip boxed wine And I'm nothing but a top notch slob Mooching off my baby's mother and a drop top Saab I'm awesome (Awesome, awesome, awesome....) (The-the sw-swa-swa-swa-swagger of a cripple) Remix, this is a remix [Hook 1: Spose & Mac Lethal] Brotherf**er, I'm awesome No you're not dude, don't lie I'm awesome I'm driving 'round in my mom's ride I'm awesome A quarter of my life gone by And I met all your mothers online Motherf**er, I'm awesome I would run away from a brawl I'm awesome There's no voicemail, nobody called I'm awesome Now I got Kansas City involved Oh yeah, uh, check it out, yo (Mac Lethal, Mac Lethal) [Verse 1: Mac Lethal] I'm awesome, sitting home alone full of toxins Thirty years old, looking like Macaulay Culkin I use d** just to hang with crazy actresses But this ain't even c**aine, it's f**ing baby laxative Protest in public, squirting out my dick putty My God damn girlfriend looks like Kid Cudi Buddy, I'mma tear them apart My friends are trendy a**holes wearing arabic scarves (Oh you fancy, huh?) Nope, I'm just awesome Beginner level, Street Fighter 4, using Dahlsim I make more money selling Oxy than I could performin' I'm masturbating while I'm reading thru the book of Mormon At my grandmother's funeral drunk But it won't start until I get her body out of the trunk My name is Mac Lethal, my style is explosive Here, have a blunt, my little sister rolled it [Hook 2: Mac Lethal] She's awesome We make it rain, and we give it I'm awesome Done with your girl in three minutes I'm awesome Laying on the couch takes work I'd beat Nicki Minaj at Wii Tennis Motherf**er, I'm awesome Never run away from the cops I'm awesome Every single day smoking crops I'm awesome North Korea, you're f**ing up I'm snacking on a push-up pop Motherf**er I'm awesome (awesome, awesome, awesome...) [Verse 2: Spose] (How you living, Spizzy Spose?) Oh, where should I begin? Nissan whip, four cylinder engine (Vroom, vroom) All my clothes got Jnco emblems And ah-he-heh-hem, all my friends are pretend (Lame) Juggalos, I blend in with them Sip wine coolers, watching Nickelodeon Look, I'm no Don Juan with the blonde babes ‘Cause my belly's getting bulbous, my chest is concave Chicks in Maine get migraines when my song plays French chicks tell me, "No parle Anglais" (Excuse me) I'm at your kid's first birthday, gin bombay Interrupting that sh** like I'm Kanye (Yo, I'ma let you finish) I'm in a house full of cats (Rawr) McDonald's snack wraps in the trash out back I'm awesome, I'm getting shunned by the bloggers While I'm sitting in a kiddie pool reading Harry Potter I'm not lying, dude, ask my neighbors Taco Bell what I bought with the paper And I don't even start sh** with the haters I weigh about the same as a fat third grader (Sup girl) And 2010's been strange weird Unemployed, signed in the same year My pajama pants got reindeer While I'm up at Applebee's drinking sangria [Hook 3: Spose] I'm awesome My stomach hurts ‘cause I can't burp I'm awesome Fred Durst ghostwrote my last verse I'm awesome I'm puking up yogurt ‘Cause I think I look fat in this shirt Motherf**er, I'm awesome Whip exterior wood grain I'm awesome I just watched a softball game I'm awesome I'm the least famous person with fame On stage with my clothes all stained Motherf**er, I'm awesome