Die Happy (US) - Bone Doctor lyrics

I awoke one evening in total pain My back was aching Driving me insane But no pulsating pain would steal my sleep So I leaped from bed to grab the aspirin jar But the pain in my back said I won't get far Lying on the floor I saw a glimmer of light I grabbed the phone book and to my surprise An intriguing ad had caught my eye 1-800-MR-BONES So I rolled to the left and grabbed the phone And made the call to Mr. Bones He said "I'm here to help you" And "I'm glad you called" Laying on the floor almost paralyzed He opened the door And caught me by surprise He was ten foot skeleton With glowing eyes He grabbed my foot and threw me to the wall He grabbed my arms and dragged me down the hall Twisting and tying me in a knot He finally had me rolled up in a ball Upside-down with my back to the wall. Then I saw him coming with a flying kick A second later I heard a crack And pain was gone in my lower back With needed sigh I melted to the floor With great relief I asked him for the bill He said "Your money won't do But your Les Paul will Oh, and by the way They call me Bones"