Dead Indian - River Valley Leper Colony lyrics

I know you plan to take me over And I fear as though you've won your game Just don't fall in love with me Don't even let your friends know my name And I'll put my arms up around you When you're bleedin' and you've come unglued You said that you've been here before And I didn't mean to take you there And if we could brush ourselves off Would we like what all was underneath Would we find a way to cover up crown of thorns Wear it like a wreath And I can't count up all the kids Hung up on crosses that they didn't make Was it you and I Or did they climb up and say, 'I'm here to stay' Can I be understood playin' my songs Or am I too damn strange You landed plastered on my porch And I was telling you you've got to change And you can pillage what I am if it helps you get the things you need Could call it all how it is You said, 'rape me' I say, 'if it lives it bleeds.' And I wish I drowned in the river When I stumbled in I reckon just a part of me did Now it's missing I can't get it back I've been grinding my teeth in my sleep And you've been wide awake Let's get up smoke a cigarette It's six AM- tell the sun to come up And when the sun is comin' up I leave my number and I walk away Give it time and I'll get well I just need a few more sober days I saw myself last night in a dream And it's not that great I really wanna die sometimes Don't understand the force that's stopping me And I'd like to take back all the sh** I've done But it's too damn late Sit and drink my jar of fire Feel my consciousness dissipate