Darby O'Gill - The Kissin' of the Sheriff's Wife lyrics

Well me name it is Michael and I've lived in Dublin all me life My father was a farmer and me mother was the farmers wife They raised them up a family of girls to number twenty-one Of which I am the youngest and me blessed father's only son Now living with so many girls ye'd think me hair'd be in curls Ye'd think I'd wear a scarf and have me earrings set with pretty purls Oh, but I am a master of a man with manly pa**ion And I always kiss the girls in a very manly fashion I wear a manly mustache and I drink me whiskey manly-like And all me friends'll warn ye not to pick a row with “manly Mike” Last week I kissed the sheriffs' wife; she kissed me back with little strife She swore it was the finest kiss she'd ever had in all her life But the sheriff saw the kissin' and he swore upon his station He'd use his legal powers to change my situation He went to the magistrate and told him of my rampage When drunk, I fell upon his wife and took unfair advantage He swore that I had pulled a knife and put it to his pretty wife And charged her for a kiss or else I'd disengage her very life Aye, and other wrongful charges he drew up without true evidence And thus convinced the magistrate that I should pay a recompense Well I had to stand the trial because I refused to pay the fine I smiled when it turn out, the magistrate; he was a friend of mine Your honor, Mister Ca**idy if you have the capacity I'll give back the kiss I stole and thus prove my vara**ity Well the sheriff's wife was willin', and the sheriff had to curse and swear As I kissed the sheriff's wife in the courtroom from the witness chair Well, Ma'am, says the magistrate, is that the kiss you lost before? Well, says she: I'm not quite sure; perhaps if I could try one more Then she kissed me without ration, a kiss of carnal pa**ion ‘Till all the girls were blushin' and the sheriff's teeth were gnashin' Araugh, proclaimed the magistrate, a clearer case I never saw For both of you are guilty of crimes not covered by the law To sentence you at all or to render a conviction As much as some might like it it's not in my jurisdiction So I said to the gallery I'll spend me next month's salary To celebrate across the street in the tavern of O'Mallery Sure and anyone who comes they can help me drink away my sin And everyone's invited. . . but do not let the sheriff in Well, we all rushed across the street in high anticipation To celebrate the famous justice of the Irish nation The word went round that drinks were free and people came from miles to see The farmer's son who'd won the day and kissed his way to liberty Well by twos and by threes we all rushed into the drinkin' hall Young men and old men and girls who were not men at all And we drank all the beer that me monthly wage would cover Then Michael Conway said that he would pay for yet another When that was finish, Ill be bound, each other man put up a pound And we drank until we couldn't lift a gla** to drink another round Then we all staggered home by the light upon the summer moon And no one that was there that night got out of bed ‘till after noon And that was the day I'll remember fondly all me life The day that made me famous for the Kissin' Of the Sheriff's Wife