Danisnotonfire - Danisnotonfire Diss Track lyrics

Hello internet, my name is Dan and today I am going to roast myself with a diss track : (f** I just hit myself in the face, okay. Let's- let's do this.) A month without uploaded he comes back with a tag That no one even tagged him in He's not a challenge to drag (ouch) So prepare for an attack And by that I mean cringe (oh) Cause the motherf**ers about to get Dragged by his fringe First things first, you're freakishly tall It's weird, you look like a noodle (true) You've got hair that was cool in 2007 And wet you just look like a poodle (hobbit) Throw in a really annoying posh voice and Yup that's Dan (posh) You're what would happen if Winnie the Pooh f**ed Slenderman You procrastinate making videos Cause getting judged is scary (oooh) You're so close to being forgotten The hate's imaginary (whoah) The only reason you get views Is you're another white guy That people ship with his friend Cause they think it's kawaii! Oh? [reasons why Dan's a fail! (yay)] I'll give you some [*gasp*] You never tweet You overeat All you do is cry and sleep Your jokes are sh**posts and memes With no originality Your family's sad you flopped Your law degree at University And anything embarra**ing that's from your past You just delete You were vegan for three weeks Then what? you missed the meat? Wow I'm so impressed By your clear moral integrity You try so hard to be peaceful And diplomatic But can't make toast without Tumblr saying you're problematic [*gasp*] I could go on There's more if I check There's more things on this list Then chins on your neck On your birthday you joked you were a quarter way to d**h A hundred? Yeah When getting out of bed makes you out of breath? So your celebrity crush was J-Law and now its Evan P.? (mhh) What the f** even is your s**uality? It's hard to put you in a box When you keep it so blurry (what is that?) I think it's just to hide That you're secretly a furry *cough* [I-I'm joking. obviously. ... okay that went deep. Repress it? yup! Before I start crying, let's wrap this sh** up] I'm gonna go and masturbate Then cry into a slice of pizza [feelings.] Shout out to the other YouTubers Especially Ryan Higa (*chuckle*) A cringe compilation mixed with cultural appropriation Met with no depreciation It's the YouTube nation Click subscribe If you wanna watch four videos a year (or three) To see my last one (from 10 years ago) just click over here (fail) So leave a comment with your reaction You can call me a liar Cause you just witnessed the roast of [Danisnotonfire] (removal of shades followed by unidentified sobbing noises from Dan)