Ant - Picket Fence lyrics

I was up and out my mothers house at 17 Been a grown a** married man ever since Family reunions, I'm talked about but never seen Cause I learned that some of them can be your nemesis Got a lot of scars on me, I'll now tell you the stories If, you promise not to take offense Homie, sit back then, Ant bring the beat in I'll try to find a place that starts to make sense now The first time I was pushed out blind Cold and naked, spanked on the a** to breathe An immigrant from heaven on earth with the work visa I announce my self with gasps and screams Before blighted white supremacy heisted my innocence I was living out life behind the picket fence Happy go lucky scared of no one With the only exception, I'm allergic to the sun Didn't know I had a image that a camera couldn't capture 100% Allah's manufacture But then came the laughter, and outside I'm battered Picket fence shattered I saw my self as ba*tard tagalong, hara**ed and spat upon By the children of slave masters who pa**ed it on The saddest songs been sung at the hands of who I call the race from hell Its a disgrace from hell Fell face first in the self hate Burst into tears when I hear my own hellish name cursed If I seem timid, its only because every mirror that I saw back then had the Earths ugliest human being in it And with that said, they would kick me till they got tired or I act dead And I, have to tell ya'll that the obvious part That I always feel free when I'm talking to god Alone on the playground, Friday afternoon And the, old sister who hums gospel tunes I saw her notice getting closer She approached me and put a knowing hand on my shoulder And booked my feelings Cause she looked at me in a way that adults very seldom look at children And with the wisdom only earned by years She read my thoughts and she welled up with tears and said "You look the way you do because you're special Not the short bus way, I mean that God's gonna test you And all of this pain is training for the day when you Will have to lead with the gift God gave to you Grown folks don't see it but the babies do And there's a chance that you can save a few" And time will prove that, she started my movement She didn't tell me to take it - she told me to use it The second time poppa ripped the womb open early And exposed me to the coldness of life prematurely Where mom's love used to live, now housed denial And when that decayed, it made it bitter and spiteful But me and my runaway, we share something special Rode into the sunset, can barely touch the pedals No strings attached, screaming, "f** Geppetto" We may live in the gutter, but we cling to each other A week before my son came, I caught a bad bounce And had to step to mom with my hands out And momma proved the two of us could not live in that house She lied to the police so they would throw us in the streets And separating from you, is something that I feel I must do Its not that I don't love you, its more that I don't trust you Its been a year since I've seen a living relative And it's just now that I'm starting to live But while I'm sitting here, choking on tears wishing that I didn't care Feeling all alone in this hemisphere, I swear upon everything I hold dear And then my wife comes near, and I hear a voice whisper in my ear "You're going through all of this because you're special Not no superstar sh**, I mean that God had to test you And all of this pain has been training for the day when you Would lead us with the gift God gave to you Your parents might not see it but your babies do And there's a chance that you can save a few" And time will prove that, she started my movement She didn't tell me to take it, she told me to use it So I use it