Mucky hiker hitching west along the M65
She's got seamen on her chest
(Semen)
And Morecambe on her sign
(More come)
She said, she'd got her menstrual cycle
I said, "You'd better flog it"
Didn't want to make a meal of her
So I gave her a lump of hot fish yogurt
I bet she comes from Macclesfield
Filthy, fat and flatulent
She couldn't make a decent brew
Ugly as a pig, she couldn't cook a Jew
(Coo-ca-choo)
It's no wonder they call them pigs
Look at the way she grunts
She thinks she's posh but she's like a tampon
'Coz they're both just stuck up c*nts
I bet she comes from Macclesfield
Turned out she owned a pub in London
Called the Old White Hart
She became my Maid of Ale
But I had to put up with her fishy c*nt farts