In Luddenum Town not a soul would look up Not a soul would look up, not a soul would look down Not a soul would look up,not a soul would look down To show me my way out of Luddenham town I saw a buffoon, a blonde headed mayor Rattling his chains and going nowhere Rattling his chains and going nowhere Eyes cold as ice, but blowing hot air Saw a man with two faces pedalling two wheels A tame pack of hounds hot on his heels Hey Tally Ho! Hold the front page news Behind him a limousine bringing his shoes Saw sons and daughters rise to their feet
Taking their empty bowls into the street And those who had gobbled their own cake for free Ordered them kettled without any tea Saw the Prince and his duchess wave from their car The crowd it waved back with insults and snarls Drive from the nightmare, back to the dream Back to the Duchy and rich, clotted cream Bought a one way ticket, no turning back The right kind of snow, but the wrong kind of track Only one train that had not broken down Soon I was heading for Nottamun town