Call from my car to say I'll be there in awhile Short plane ride and I will get to see your pretty smile Nothing on the radio I fiddle with the dial Then I see a sign the airport's just another mile I check my bags and think about how much I hate to fly And as I near security I almost start to cry Well I hope the law enforcement agents can't tell from my face I've got 3 balloons of coke in an uncomfortable place I'm sweating and I'm nervous and I need a little air Cause with 4 balloons of h**n it's gettin' crowded up in there Crowded up in there Mind is all a jumble and my blood is cold as ice I dread the thought of having to unload this merchandise Relax I say it's not so bad it might feel kind of nice Besides who hasn't had a finger up there once or twice I must remember don't leave any d** inside the host I did that once and a girl who tossed my salad overdosed
Well I say a little prayer Hail Maria full of grace I've got 3 balloons of coke in an uncomfortable place I'm sweating and I'm nervous and I need a little air And I swear I'm farting lines of blow into my underwear From my derriere I was a little eager when I loaded up my stash 5 balloons of ecstasy and 6 balloons of hash 8 balloons of LSD and 9 of sensimilla A box of Chinese fireworks Guatemalan child I made it to the gate now and my joy I can't contain I board the aircraft take my seat in the co*kpit of the plane As I taxi down the runway I get a smile on my face I've got 3 balloons of coke in an uncomfortable place Flight crew prepare for take off as I lift us into air And by the way does anyone want to buy Guatemalan child From my derriere I've got 3 balloons Mmm I've got 3 balloons Mmm I've got 3 balloons