It was a sunny day. I woke up late. I drank too much.
Last night there was a spider on my bed.
I had a pocketful of change that was laid out by my right hand
Next to the spider by my head.
It used to be that I was scared of bugs and I would squash them
When I saw them I would k** them dead.
But here it was I wasn't scared cause I was probably still drunk.
I had a spider on my bed.
Chorus:
There he goes. He's bouncing up and down.
His little eyes are flashing but he doesn't make a sound.
I wonder why his little fangs are smiling at me?
And I was gonna squash but I'm gonna let him be right now.
SPIDER ON MY BED! SPIDER ON MY BED! SPIDER ON MY BED!
SPIDER ON MY BED! SPIDER ON MY BED! SPIDER ON MY BED!
I was stressed out all week so I went out to blow off steam
And met up with a bunch of crazy drunks.
We went to Uncle Waldo's Pub and in about an hour we reeked
Just like a gang of stinking skunks.
(PICK IT UP PICK IT UP PICK IT UP PICK IT UP)
And I have no idea how I got home last night and if I drove
I'm so surprised that I'm not dead!
But I feel OK now and I'm ready to do it all again
Thanks to the spider on my bed.
Chorus