Afraid to be Lyrics:
Intro:
Yeah, Listen
Let me break this sh** down for you
From one to twenty
Verse:
I was at the crib
Chillin with a bottle
No like I was a baby just s**in on a nozel
Then I learned to crawl
Learnin how to Speak
Mamma sing me a lullaby so I sleep
At the age of three I remember sorta vidid images of the plane down to California
Startin elementary- people mentor me- and give me knowledge- but out of pocket
Daddys got it
Always got it
Turnin 5 at the time and attending kindergarten
Got a target
To makin progress
So I'm makin an effort to ace a drawin
Work is really borin and super early up in the morning
But I think I'm noticing a couple friends are forming
Playdates and an otterpop when it's really scorching now we're all joining in extracurricular sporting and I'm shaking kids hands after soccer tournaments
Askin bout my right one- I was born with it- mama always told me never never to call it deformity
(She you really shouldn't say that you're really special...)
This wasn't really phasin me early off in the races I was always at a parallel with these parallel faces- now because a conscious is stirring up in my matrix
Real world people racist see- and this is make believe- feel discrimination where there really ain't you see come to think of it I really was a slave to me- shaking anybodys hand was takin bravery
Uncomfortable like I'm ashamed to be
While I'm judging on my self I needed pain relief it never came to me and I was stained to see- that it was make believe- open the gate for me I'm so afraid to be
Still I keep rising like a bakery- age 14 seeking what is made of me age 15 think is when I made a beat
Stayed hooked till the top like drapery
More on that later
At the time the priority wasn't beat maker
Too concerned with transitioning to the ninth grade
New girls and old friends that might fade
Guess back in 8th grade we role played
One year in highschool you all jade
Or maybe I did I can't say
That's change it's all good we okay you freshmen find matching clicks- cuz I ain't having it
Till those freshman double practices- and I was smackin kids
Ya'll invited me back to the Hagman crib
Chris Eddie Mike June and the Hagman twins
That's a summer we can talk about and laugh a bit
Football was a blast and we had to win
Ya'll one year that don't factor in- we were still stickin tight middle pa**ages- am I an African?
Cuz I spit so hard when I'm ga**in in
Yeah 16's when I struck a pa**ion in- rappin quick- don't understand like half of it
When I vocalize a venom that the wise have felt- from inside myslef- composed the rhyme myself- showed the homies and they thought it was hot-maybe a cla**ic- this was more organic than pieces those corner mashups
Make original music and see their hands up
But I knew I had to confront my demons and man up
All the years I was stressin hidding my hand bruh- now you spin the record I'll start to hit ya with answers
17 when my homies had graduated I knew my senior years was irrelevant had to make it my momma made that I'm late and I'm in my cla**es impatient I waited till I hit the station composin up to the AM
The same year that a girl had dipped in my pocket- stole my V card straight out my wallet next to a faucet
Knew I could have waited but foolish pride had me racin the moment initiated right after leaving the basement
Yeah the p**y is power but been a star- I can see a lot more coming if I stick with these bars- sweet calligraphy sweet delivery hittin my mark
Maybe college is the place that will put me on the radar
By the time I was bout to be college bound I was coming around putting in work to polish a sound
Committed to this game like I'm Nicholson in the crowd
Recording in my dorm room closet laying it down
Knew that Chico State was the place to turn it up loud
Kids are turnin up with a 5th I turn up the sound
And as far as women you know the girl that I found
Rather found me and then started dragging me down
But she showed me love for like every flaw that I owned
My first girlfriend I could say was a stepping stone
Around nineteen you can find me shaking a hand
Took a pair of decades to find that I even can
So afraid to be till I try to grow and expand
Currently I love looking back at where I began
Currently I'm twenty no money set with a plan
Imma make my music and love myself as a man
Whose afraid to be just relate with me if you can
Cuz now when I'm performing I'm proudly raising my hand
Yeah the 3 in Proph3cY was all part of the plan
You put me on this earth and I'll do the best that I can