You want me to bring you home the bacon
Fry it up and serve it to you, too
When i don't you act so godforsaken
Like somehow i've been mistreatin' you
I know that's the way your mama did it
She waited on you dang near all your life
It took a while but now i finally get it
You were never lookin' for a wife
[Chorus]
If you want a mother i can be one
That ain't all that difficult for me
We can do your way from now on, son
And i'll show you what a mother i can be
Remember tuesday night when you're out bowling
You better have your bu*t back home by nine
Otherwise you're grounded for the weekend
And that brand new sliverado will be mine
And in the evenin' when you're feeling sleepy
Well, i'll tuck you in and pat you on your head
And i'll be right down the hall if you should need me
But big boys have to sleep in their own bed
[Repeat Chorus]
You can go on back to mama's apron strings
Bet your mom would be a mother just like me