Oh, as I was going to Derby
'Twas on the market day
I met with the finest ram, sir
That ever was fed upon hay
That's a lie, that's a lie, that's a lie, a lie, a lie!
This ram and I got drunk, sir
As drunk as drunk could be
And when we wakened up
We were far away out on the sea
That's a lie, that's a lie, that's a lie, a lie, a lie!
But this wonderful old ram, sir
Was playful as a kid
He swallowed the captain's spygla**
Along with the bo's'n's fid
That's a lie, that's a lie, that's a lie, a lie, a lie!
One morning on the poopdeck
Before eight bells was rung
He borrowed the captain's s**tant
Took a shot at the sun
That's a lie, that's a lie, that's a lie, a lie, a lie!
And one night was wet and rough, sir
The wind was blowing free
He borrowed me suit of oilskins
And took me trick at the wheel
That's a lie, that's a lie, that's a lie, a lie, a lie!
The butcher that k**ed the ram, sir
Was up to his knees in blood
And the boy who told the tale
He was washed away in the flood
That's a lie, that's a lie, that's a lie, a lie, a lie!
Oh, as I was going to Derby
'Twas on the market day
I met with the finest ram, sir
That ever was fed upon hay
That's a lie, that's a lie, that's a lie, a lie, a lie!
That's a lie, that's a lie, a lie, a lie!