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Amateur Transplants - Couples Counselling D lyrics

I've got a broadband connection
And a laptop with a Pentium four processor
With Intel inside
My girlfriend thought I needed it
For PowerPoint and other sh**
But when I told her that I guess I lied

When I'm at my desk and I get the horn
Down goes my left hand, up comes the p**n

I've filled my C: drive up with pics
Of Abbie Titmus s**ing dicks
And several hundred home movies
Like Pamela and Tommy-Lee's
Have I given you a clue?
The bare celebrities are what I like to view
[Lyrics from: https:/]

I love those bare celebrities
Those hardcore bare celebrities
Forget about your girlfriends and your wives!
I mean those bare celebrities
Those Paris Hilton MPG's
And double-penetration readers wives (.com)!

I love those bare celebrities
Those online bare celebrities
My mates think I'm a big computer geek
But I'm just browsing celebrities
And JPG's of under-three's **

They caught me and my case comes up next week!

** This line has been changed to some (generally more shocking;-) alternatives in live performances.

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