Alec - The Caper (Funk Volume's "Don't Fu(n)k Up Our Beats" 2012 Contest Entry) lyrics

[Intro] What up? It's your super pal Al--ec Comin' here with another song that's sick Turn it up Turn it up Turn it up But really, turn it up. It sounds a lot better [Verse 1] The astounding rapper sounding like a lotta bucks The sober douchebag, is he on a lotta d**? Not a buzz, not a high, rapping on that natural Rapping hard as 'concrete,' that is f**ing 'factual." I rap like a 'h*mo,' I rap like a 'genus.' Ask your math teacher, I rap the 'meanest.' If you slept on me, you would probably f**ing dream this I'm so far gone, yeah, you wouldn't believe it Man, I got an 'ill ride,' everybody 'Hops in!' "Stop him! Impossible, can't nobody top him." Call up anybody, call Batman and Robin Not them can stop me, I am f**ing rotten You're not 'hip,' but I guess you are a 'waist' of time 'waste' of mine, you're 'trash,' wordplay is f**ing fine I wanna 'blow up,' yeah this rapping world will soon be 'mine.' Gettin' presidential 'head,' just like a freakin' dime I do say J.K.; I never get ladies I never get laid, hey, this life is so crazy! It's no debate, babe, you f**ers freaking stay fake Stay awake, I stay great at every place I migrate You can't see me, cause you know that I'm the best f** the rest, I know that I'm the best up in this f**ing test Probably not, I don't know, I have so many f**ing thoughts I'm like that one dude who raps in a paradox [Verse 2] "Look at this rapper in school with a b**h lisp Who says f** a lot and really spits when he spits sh** He's sick kid, maybe addicted to dicks, b**h! I can't stop listening, I try to resist it." Resist it? No, sit back and listen! I'm like crazy with a little cynical mixed in! Vixens listed watch out cause I spit sick Both literally and lyrically, don't get it twisted! I'm taking names like I got high score on Pac-Man Not a bad man, manical when I'm rappin' I'm the Bane of your life, now lets get it crackin'! Batman reference, evil like Drakken Close that p**n tab open, you done fappin' Cause you already f**ed yourself when you heard me rappin' Time to stop sleepin' on me, you done nappin.' Let's cut the bullsh** now, I'm done chatin' I'm f**ing underground, catch me in Japan Everyone chanting "Alec is the Man!" Kinda like Em, you won't 'understan' The secrets of my methods and how I go ham I'm rappin' right now, you're 'idle' like Simon My rhymes take virginity and bust them hymens Cause I put my heart in everything I rhyme, man f** it, I don't need a 'thou' just to know that I'm 'grand.' Stay super! Turn it up!