Alan Menken - Jacka** in a Can lyrics

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Alan Menken - Jacka** in a Can lyrics

Squire 1: Well, another party for the fancy folk that get to bathe once a month. Oh, that reminds me: Did you hear about the knight that got off his high horse? Galavant: No Squire 1: Me neither. *all squires laugh* Squire 2: Knights s** Galvant: They're not all that bad are they? Squire 3: Sure, they are Squire 4: Worse even Squire 4: Your average knight in armor, he's utterly the pits Squire 3: His ego's so humungous, his helmet barely fits Squire 4: He wears two tons of padding and thinks he's quite the man Squire 2: He's nothing but a jacka** in a fancy metal can Squires 1-4: A jacka** in a can There's nothing worser than Some high and mighty jacka** in a can (All spit in their cups) Squire 1: My master hasn't had a sip of his port without my spit in it in years. I got him cravin' it now. I gave him two months without it, he said it didn't taste right. *all squires laugh* Squire 2: *to Galavant* So, what about your knight? Is he as bad as ours? Galavant: Uh, yeah, sure There's all that fame and glory Squire 1: The smell, though? Not so great Galavant: And then those big, long lances Squire 3: Yeah, to overcompensate Galavant: The glamor and swagger Squire 1: Yeah, I'm not really a fan Galavant: He's quite-- Squire 2: A major dillweed? Galavant: *resigned* In a fancy metal can Squires and Galavant: A dillweed in a can There's nothing lamer than A condescending dillweed in a can Squire 1: And who does all the planning Squire 2: Yeah, and who does all the work Galavant: True Squire 4: Who gets no vacation Squire 3: Not one pay raise, not one perk Galavant: Good point Squire 2: Whose third rate insurance comes without a dental plan Galavant: Your average, humble squire All: And not the meathead in the can That jerkface in a can There's nothing sadder than Galavant: Some over muscled, chauvinistic Self indulgent, egotistic Stingy, prissy, narcississy All: Jacka** in a can! Galavant: Oh, my God. That's me