Aidan Moffat & the Best-Ofs - Oh Men! lyrics

Oh men, what are we like? Why can't we just stop gazing? Why must we always ogle? What makes them so amazing? Sometimes it's just a bosom Sometimes it's just a wiggle Sometimes it's just the rump Or just the jeans, or just the jiggle Be they schoolgirl, be they teacher Be they housewife, be they hussy Be they scholar, be they halfwit - Face it, boys, we're just not fussy! Now, I don't think we're all the same But I think there's few exceptions - Yes, we all love to lech We're all slaves to our erections And they say we don't grow up That we all just need our mothers And they've maybe got a point But listen to me, brothers: We can claim it's just our nature We can swear it's just our way But that's a modern myth It's just the easy thing to say Because Mother Nature says that women Should find the fittest donor - Yes, they should sleep around And Man should be the loner! And women once were worshipped Until Christians crashed the scene And said, 'Your place is in the home And your pleasure is obscene!' So don't mistake your woman For your plaything or your prey Cause she'll probably outshine you In almost every way Yes, you can do your cleaning And you can do your cooking: Give the ladies some respect - But there's still no harm in looking! My love, what am I like? You should be all I need I'm yours until I die I'm in love with you, indeed We don't see eye to eye Not every day is sunny (In fact I'm sure when you hear this You'll think it's pretty funny) So, to ask a stupid question: Could I love you more? Not much And even though I'm looking I swear I could never touch My heart and hands are yours Just let me keep my eyes And I'll rip them out myself Should infidelity arise!